My creative freedom. I was the creative director of a large fashion brand when I packed it all in to pursue my writing.

When I first started at The Connaught, I bought a pair of antique diamond earrings at Fred Leighton in New York.

Mabel, my wonderful classic VW campervan.

My short film, Scrubber, in 2011. At that time in my life it seemed easier to pay for it myself than to apply for funds.

I was nearly hit by an enormous gold-fibreglass cherub in a shopping centre. It fell five storeys and smashed into a thousand pieces about 4ft away from me.

This is going to horribly upset my wife, my children and my grandchildren, but it was when I did The Greatest Snowman last year for Channel 4. Being let loose on an Austrian mountainside to build snow sculptures was my happy point, and who knew I’d find an icy G-spot at nearly 58.

I am crucified by my modesty: it’s terrible.

Other people’s decorating, if I feel they’ve missed an opportunity and just decorated in that wet-cardboard, modern-grey thing. That’s a life not properly lived.

The missus. She is the glamour mamma mia at the top of our feudal pyramid. We all live together, so she’s a full-time grandmother and rules the roost. How she steered us through lockdown was extraordinary.