Monica Dolan: What is the harshest thing anyone has said to you? — FLAPSS

The question

What is the harshest thing anyone has said to you?

Originally asked

The Guardian, to a different person each week, The Q&A

A fixed Guardian Q&A prompt asked directly across respondents and years.

You answer as yourself. Nobody on FLAPSS answers as anybody else.

MD

Monica Dolan

Recorded said elsewhere, not written here

Another actress once said to me, “I’ve told you huge lies to make you feel good about yourself.” I’m not going to say who.

The Q&A, The Guardian, 6 January 2024 source ↗

Others on this question

View all 122 →

Charles Dance British actor

“You can’t play Maxim de Winter with ginger hair.”

Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 30 November 2024 source ↗

Cybill Shepherd American actress and former model

A review that said I had the charm of a hamster.

Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 7 June 2008 source ↗

Johannes Radebe

I’ll never amount to anything. Who? He was my rival at dance school. It hurt and is something that I’ve always had in the back of my head to defy.

Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 28 March 2026 source ↗

“You’re selfish.” It was a friend.

Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 19 April 2025 source ↗

More from Monica Dolan

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Question What do you fear most? Identity & self

Being lost and no one wanting to find me.

Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 6 January 2024 source ↗

Question What do you believe happens when we die? Death & what remains

Our friends are sad and miss us for a bit but, hopefully, they find other people at the party.

Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 6 January 2024 source ↗

Question What disappointment has stayed with you longest? Failure & regret

Not marrying the person I wanted to marry, but now I think it’s probably good that I didn’t.

Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 6 January 2024 source ↗

Question When were you most embarrassed? Failure & regret

I once walked up to Harriet Walter while she was having lunch on her own because I thought I knew her, and then when I got up to the table I realised I didn’t know her, I just recognised her because she was Harriet Walter.

Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 6 January 2024 source ↗

Question If you could revise one chapter of your past, what would you change? Failure & regret

My friend Fritha Goodey wouldn’t have committed suicide.

Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 6 January 2024 source ↗

Question Which trait in yourself do you like least? Identity & self

I try too hard not to get things wrong.

Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 6 January 2024 source ↗

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