My first holy communion, where my trousers were too big for me and fell down, a circumstance which earned me both the instant contempt of the girls and the heightened interest of the priests. That’s just how it was in 1975.

Appearing on US breakfast radio. I heard the DJ say that after the news we would hear from the author Lincoln Child. I had to choose between making a guy with a mixed-up PR release look like an idiot or pretending to be Lincoln. I pretended.

When I was 11, I went down a water slide and my bottoms didn’t go with me. Everyone saw my bare white butt.

In order to raise money to pay for myself to go to the National Youth Theatre, I performed a medley of my drama school speeches and some songs for my entire school. Considering I can’t sing, this was terrible. I did U Remind Me by Usher and Hey There Delilah by the Plain White T’s. They paid £2 each – basically, to laugh at me.

To have been one of the people who brought hypnotherapy to the world.

The most intensive and beautiful golden sunlight. It’s the strongest force in the universe.

Pleasure is a glass of champagne, happiness is when you are living your values. I get up each morning and I’m excited by the day, and I have good health. This is the happiest that I’ve ever been.

Impatience. My dad said I was born in a hurry.

People mistaking my kindness for weakness and stealing from me.

My wife dying. I wouldn’t know how to go on.