Originally asked
The Guardian, to a different person each week, The Q&A
The Guardian's long-running Q&A repeatedly asks this standing question, with minor tense variation.
You answer as yourself. Nobody on FLAPSS answers as anybody else.
The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 3 June 2023 source ↗
When I was a teenager, I worked in a vegetable shop on Saturdays, and the guy had a rotation of 10 pretty teenagers working for him and was really sleazy. I only went twice because the second time he made me go up to his flat above the shop and clean his toilet, and he was watching me.
Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 16 September 2023 source ↗
A lot of awful gigs. You can’t become a successful comedian without dying on your arse more times than you can remember.
Recorded The Q&A, The Guardian, 15 November 2025 source ↗
I was a terrible secretary in a publishing company (clumsy, disorganised, hid letters behind the filing cabinet because I was supposed to have done something with them and I wasn’t sure what).
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 19 September 2020 source ↗
Working in a warehouse, packing frozen meat. It was a nightmare: I hate the cold and it was very tough.
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 15 August 2020 source ↗
People who barge into a lift instead of standing aside for anyone exiting should be dipped in kerosene and fired into the sun.
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 3 June 2023 source ↗
I could have done without being sexually assaulted, or having an eating disorder, or pushing myself to breaking point, but every chapter of my life brought me here.
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 3 June 2023 source ↗
Self-destruction.
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 3 June 2023 source ↗
When my cold toes drain the heat from his warm ones, but he doesn’t mind at all and is happy for our tarsal temperatures to meet in the middle.
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 3 June 2023 source ↗
In the one photo I’ve seen where my smile looks convincing – I’m four years old, so I’m guessing then. But I just won a Bafta and that felt amazing, too. So, roughly every 40 years.
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 3 June 2023 source ↗
I’ve never been upgraded on a plane.
Recorded The Guardian, The Q&A, The Guardian, 3 June 2023 source ↗
Adeel Akhtar, Adjoa Andoh, Adrian Dunbar, Adrian Edmondson, Aidan Gillen, Alex Jones
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