That would have to be a film called Pickup On 101. It was a very interesting story, about a wandering musician and an old guy on his way back to his home town to spend his last days, but they made it into a pile of dishonest trash.

I was a ticket taker at the Universal Amphitheatre, an outdoor music venue. I saw everybody – Joni Mitchell, Linda Ronstadt, Neil Young, the Eagles, Elton. But, after that, we had to clean the women’s restrooms and that was horrible. There was a lot of drinking, a lot of vomiting, a lot of very messy bathrooms.

Children’s underwear department at Marks & Spencer, Oxford Circus. I was 16 years old, earning money in my summer holidays.

I had to choreograph dancing cows for a commercial. I had to superimpose footage of dancing legs – some were mine – on to the cow. It was bonkers.

I was once walking through Edinburgh with someone in the industry. I was quite drunk and I slowly wet myself.

My children ending up anything like me.

My complete lack of organisation that affects all part of my life – my living space, my being in touch with people, everything. I am a walking shitshow.

A comedian or rapper. You can tell by the way I’m dressed that I’m a frustrated rapper.

The arcade game, Guitar Hero. I’ve got the full unit in my house. It’s so sad.

Their inability to deal with my disorganisation.