Downstairs, the boys gaze at a screen on the old futon in the playroom. We will figure out what to do about them soon enough. They probably already know what’s up and are waiting for us to figure out how to say it. Their very existence is the one dark piece I cannot get right within all this. I can let go of a lot of things: plans, friends, career goals, places in the world I want to see, maybe even the love of my life. But I cannot figure out how to let go of mothering them.

One thing, it's too big a subject and I want to talk about it on paper if I talk about it at all. But I can say this much, because I thought the life that my father and mother would have had together was cut short and something of what they might have achieved I hope that I'm achieving in my work.

But it was quite intense to be the first Black person that my German friends had seen. Actually laid eyes, and hands, on. And there was the German language, which I had to learn, and the German kids learned British English, so my American English was frowned upon. … Maybe I write like I do because I spent those years in the cauldron of not fluently speaking the native language of my classmates. Those several years of being told that the tongue I spoke wasn’t right.

It was a sustained nervous breakdown really, over a long period.

there is a flight leaving in 20 minutes, but there's only two first class seats left and it's going to be like $7,000." And I went, "All right, let's do it. Put us on that flight."

The first version of my How to Live book was 1300 pages. It took a couple of years to write and it was 1300 pages, and then it took a couple of years to edit it down to 115 pages. Most of my writing process is editing.

In one month, two of my old prejudices were reversed. Two things that I was prejudiced against.

When I was 19, my boss in the circus – I worked in the circus for 10 years. I was, like, a ringleader, MC of a circus – and my boss at the circus really cared about me and she said, "I read this book called 'Awaken the Giant Within' by Tony Robbins.

Keep you uncorked, keep you unstuck, keep it flowing, keep the ideas going, keep the feedback, keep you in communication with your potential future customers for the book. I think it's a great idea.

In one month, two of my old prejudices were reversed. Two things that I was prejudiced against. I am now prejudiced towards, in favor of.